Soren Behind the Camera

Soren wanted to take some photos this morning while I did a little yoga. Here is her unedited handiwork:

Prayer position. What focus.


Nice triangle. Look up toward that hand.


Note to self: perhaps I should put my scanties away before giving Soren the camera. They're clean. But my back isn't straight. I guess I need a wall mirror at home. Colby will get right on that.



Watching a little Desperate Housewives while practicing yoga/folding laundry/eating.


Gotta have a photo of the feet.


Said folded laundry. Including Colby's undies.


Haha. Soren's short. :-)



You should all be proud that I just put photos of myself sans shower, makeup and hair styling on my blog for the world to see. Maybe proud is a strong word. How about....surprised?

No Boys Allowed

My bff and her kids came to visit on Sunday while our spouses went to the cigar bar. We had a really nice visit. Or at least I thought we did....

Evelyn decided that her room was off limits to her brothers and presumably Gavin (although he was really good and wasn't bothering her). I guess after spending the whole week at home with her brothers for Spring break she'd finally had enough. I found this on her door:

Cookie Dough Cupcakes

Have you ever felt the need to eat a treat that's both a cookie and a cupcake? I have. The girls and I embarked on our quest for cookie/cupcake goodness with a recipe for chocolate chip cookie dough cupcakes.

First we made a cookie dough, rolled the dough into a bunch of little balls, and placed them in the freezer for 3 hours.



Then I whipped up a homemade yellow cake recipe. We placed a little cookie ball on the top of each cupcake before we popped them in the oven.



Once they were cooled off, I made some chocolate frosting. Evelyn was ready to decorate, and Colby was "happy" to help. Can't you tell by the look on his face?



The cupcakes were yummy, but I definitely saw room for improvement. We'll certainly be making them again. Maybe we could finally use up all those Christmas-themed cupcake wrappers.

Baby It's Cold Outside

Spring has supposedly arrived. I'll believe it's here after the cats have to stop sleeping on the heating vents to stay warm.

Operation

I loved playing the classic board game Operation as a kid. Our family also has Operation in its game closet, but it tends not to be played by the rules. When our kids play, Brody just pays himself all the money without even doing a surgery. Evelyn only plays if she can win. Dade doesn't play.

Soren on the other hand loves to perform surgery on the poor, naked patient. It sounds like this: buzzzzz, zzzz, buzzzzzzz, zzzzzzzzz.



Mommy, I did it!!

Egg Salad

I found a great recipe for egg salad in the most recent Everyday Food magazine. It's a lot less fatty than traditional egg salad, and the dogs were more than happy to eat the extra boiled egg yolks.

4 large eggs
1 tsp Dijon mustard
1 Tbls fresh lemon juice (this was too much for my tastes)
1/4 avocado, diced (I didn't have a ripe one, but I wish I had)
coarse salt and freshly ground pepper
2 slices smoked salmon
1/3 c watercress, thick ends trimmed (didn't have any, I've never bought it)
2 slices whole wheat bread, toasted (I used English muffins)

1. In a small pot, cover eggs with water by 1 inch and bring to a boil over high heat. Cover, remove from heat, and let sit for 12 minutes. Transfer eggs to a colander and run cold water over them until they are cool enough to handle. Peel eggs and separate whites from the yolk. Reserve one yolk (or two if you're like me). Coarsely chop the egg whites.

2. In a medium bowl, whisk together mustard and lemon juice. Finely grate egg yolk into mustard mixture and whisk to combine. Stir in egg whites and avocado and season with salt and pepper. To serve, divide smoked salmon, egg salad, and watercress between toasts. Serves 2 (or one if you're like me).

Backyard Fun

Thank goodness Spring is upon us so that the kids can get outside and play. Of course, it now means that my floor is covered in layer upon layer of sand.

Soren has returned to her place in the sandbox making sand pies.




Dade spent hours digging a hole in the garden for no reason other than he likes to dig. The hole is now filled in with compost and dirt for this summer's garden.


Here's to the first of many beautiful days in the sand box.

Circus!

This year Soren got two chances to go to the Shriner's Circus: we went on Friday with our friends A & R and their two kiddos, and then Colby took all the kids plus his brother, nephew, and dad to the show on Saturday. Colby got a ton of free tickets thanks to his Shriner friends. For some reason, Colby is a Shriner groupie...perhaps because they meet every Wednesday afternoon to drink beer as part of their shrine activities.

I notoriously hate all things circus, zoo, or Children's Museum. I know, I'm a terrible parent. Friday's show was made more bearable by the presence of my grown-up friends.

We had to make a stop at Runza before the circus so we could eat. Of course, Soren got a burger and an Icee. I was stuck with a grilled chicken sandwich, a salad, and an iced tea. Booooo for good food choices.



A & R's kids had never eaten cotton candy and refused to try the bites Soren offered. What the heck?? Soren ate plenty all on her own and was then covered in a thick layer of dried slobber/sugar. You can see little Lulu in the background of one of the photos in the "cotton candy series". She's such a doll.







I only got one shot from Saturday's circus adventure, mainly because I didn't attend the show. Here's our van load of kids headed to supper at Cici's Pizza with grandma and grandpa and Aunt Carrie:

GOP: The Party of Fiscal Responsibility????

The House voted today to eliminate federal funding of NPR (National Public Radio) and banned local broadcasting stations from using federal funds to pay fees to NPR or buy NPR programming.

Sure, times are tough, and there are things that this country needs to do to be fiscally responsible. According to the article I read it looks like cutting funding to NPR will save perhaps a whopping $60 million. And my whopping I mean measly. I mean, come on, people. The GOP claims that it is trying to balance the budget, cut the deficit, make America better and more responsible. There is tons of money spent on far more frivolous things......and millionaires who could surely chip in a little bit more tax money.....in fact, maybe the $60 million needed for NPR.....or perhaps some money for Planned Parenthood....

Here's how I would explain this to my kids, "Guys, we need to cut some things out of our budget. Times are tough, and we need to save money. The good news is that mommy still gets to spend $30 at Starbucks. (Side note: I don't.) The bad news is that we will have to stop donating that $10 a week to charity."

It's ridiculous. Party of fiscal responsibility?? How about party of fiscal douchebaggery.

Cards and Tags

I'm finally taking the opportunity to really utilize and explore my Cricut die-cut maker. I have zero time for scrapbooking mostly because I don't have anywhere to put all my stuff. Every time I want to work I have to pull everything out and then put it all away. It's a pain in the ass. However, making greeting cards and gift tags requires a little less work and a little less creativity, as well, honestly. I still have to pull lots of stuff out and then put it all away, but it's not quite so bad.

I'm going to try and sell a few things at my friend's Scentsy open house. Here are a few examples of my handiwork...




If no one buys anything I can surely use it all on my friends and family. It's a win-win situation...and you know how much I hate to lose.

Birthday Lists

The crappiest thing about getting older isn't wrinkles or responsibilities or the lack of light-up shoes. No, I think the worst thing about aging is that you don't get loads of presents anymore. In fact, not many folks even ask you what you want for your birthday. My children compile their birthday lists year round, for goodness sake. My birthday is coming up right around the corner, and even though I'll be 32 years old, I'd like to think that I'm still young enough to want stuff for my birthday. So, here goes (in no particular order):

Zumba game for Wii
bag for my yoga mat
ottoman for the living room
potted herbs that can later be transferred to my garden
scrapbooking stuff (that will probably just sit unused)
organizers for my scrapbooking stuff
high quality biscuit cutters (won't bend when I shut them in the drawer repeatedly)
container that carries cupcakes
ice cream maker

Taking a Moment to Discuss the 4th Amendment

So many of my recent blog posts have been politically focused recently. My home life is pretty boring which is fabulous, so I guess I have more time to ponder more of what's going on "out there" and not worry so much about the home front.

Nebraska's Unicameral is considering a bill that would require all folks with children applying for welfare benefits to undergo a drug test. Apparently, corn-fed folks are tired of paying for welfare for all the god damn druggies. And who would blame them? I don't want my hard-earned, wait....I wouldn't want Colby's hard-earned money going to some strung out person selling his/her, wait....mostly her EBT food card for drug money. I employ all these dots for a few reasons:

#1: This is a bill introduced by our mostly male lawmakers who in our society control a majority of the assets.

#2: It's mostly women and their children who would be impacted, again with little regard for the male parent. Although the bill would require married parents to both get tested, I assume, you can't tell me that this bill doesn't target the stereotype of the welfare queen.

Sounds fair, huh?

Despite these reservations about this bill, my concern is much greater. Americans have a right under the 4th Amendment to be free from the government's unlawful search and seizure of our stuff and our bodies. That's a pretty big deal and means that unless the government has a damn good reason to drug test me, they can fuck off. That's a god damn guarantee. Comparing a private company's right to drug test you if you work for them to allowing the government to drug test you if you want welfare benefits is comparing apples to oranges. Private business and the government operate on two separate planes completely. Don't you dare bring that point up during this discussion.

If you get welfare and then get busted for using drugs, I could see requiring a parent to go to treatment in order to keep welfare benefits. But completely stripping those benefits for one positive drug test is cruel.

My next reservation is possibly even deeper: where does it end? If we're going to test people with kids for drugs when they apply for food stamps, why can't we test senior citizens who want their Medicaid and Social Security? I don't want Colby's hard-earned money going to a strung out grannie, either, right?? Oh, and what about all those other folks who receive all those other pesky government benefits like farmers who get subsidies or corporations who take tax breaks? Oh, and get ready to pee in a cup in order to get your tax refund, to go into the library, or to get clean water. Those things are all pretty much government benefits.

And what exactly are they drug testing for? Marijuana? Prescription drugs that can easily be abused? Cough syrup? Crack? Meth? Nicotine? Alcohol?? What's a "drug"? If you're assuming people can afford cigarettes, why should they get WIC?? That's a damn expensive habit.

For all my ranting and raving, there is a bottom line here: it's estimated that the drug testing would cost Nebraskans $150,000 but would only save the state around $50,000. Gosh, that makes a whole lot of sense if it's true, doesn't it?

All of this just so we can point fingers at poor folks and leave kids to starve. Way to go, Nebraska.

Taking a Moment to Discuss the First Amendment

If there's any Constitutional right of which I am quite fond, it's my First Amendment rights to free speech. Face it, I'm a loud mouth. What's more American than being able to wear a t-shirt that says something crude about boobs while listening to misogynistic rap music and bitching about what a fucking socialist douchebag Obama is?? Come on!! I LOVE it! Although I'm not exactly sure that's the scenario the Founders had in mind when crafting the Amendment.... Anyway, this week has provided me with many opportunities to have an internal debate about what exactly is included and protected in the First Amendment.

The Supreme Court recently ruled that the protests perpetrated by the Westboro Baptist Church are protected under the First Amendment guarantees to free speech. As described by one of my previous blogs, the Westboro BC protests the funerals of dead soldiers because Americans tolerate gay people and are henceforth doomed by God. While said protests are both wrong and inhumane, they are in my eyes protected speech. The protests really aren't aimed at a particular person and are actually a broader criticism of the American government's tolerance of gay folks (tolerance being quite broad here people...tolerance is not the same as being inclusive or supportive). Some of the funerals they protest aren't gay soldiers or gay Americans. I'm sure some are. The point is that Westboro BC uses funerals as a pulpit from which to protest because it stirs up lots of emotion and controversy. Plus, I can go to a Westboro BC protest and yell my ass off at them about what huge ass hats they all are and how whatever God is out there hates the shit out of them.

Another ruling came down today in regards to a high school student who wore an inappropriate t-shirt to school. Here's a little clip form HuffPost:

In 2006, Naperville's Neuqua Valley High School allowed students to participate in a nationwide "Day of Silence," which promotes tolerance of the gay community. While some students decided to wear shirts that expressed that tolerance, one student showed up in a shirt that read: "Be Happy, Not Gay."

The school made the student cover up the part of the shirt that said "not gay." The student was mad and sued.

The ACLU filed a brief supporting this student's right to wear said t-shirt to school citing that she was only exercising her First Amendment rights. This is where I say, "BULL SHIT!" Can I wear a shirt to school that says "Retards are Stupid" or "Christians are Assholes" ??? Can I wear a shirt to school that proclaims "Glad I'm White!" or maybe "Be Happy, Not Mexican!"??? No, I can't for a few reasons:

#1 The school has a dress code in place for a reason. They don't need crap like this interrupting the school day.

#2 Wearing a t-shirt directly states to each and every gay student in the school that "I don't like you". It isn't a broad criticism (the National Day of Silence, on the other hand, was a broad protest), it's pointing the finger. Now, if that student would've gotten an organized group together to voice opposition to the Day of Silence, I would say awesome. Do your thing. However, gay students have the right not to walk down the hallways and see a shirt that demeans them. No student should have to be exposed to that. I take issue with all those shirts out there that say stuff like Boys Suck and Boys Drool. It's one thing for a girl to wear a shirt that says Girls Rock and another thing entirely for a shirt to be demeaning to boys. Period.

#3 When I was in school there were these shirts that had stupid sexually suggestive sayings on them and were made by the brand Big Johnson. Remember those? We couldn't wear them. It's not really age appropriate for a middle/high schooler to wear a t-shirt that's suggestive of intercourse or boners or big boobs. Same issue here. We can't forget that high schools are full of children. It's not about being offensive, it's about being mature. There's a time and a place, and perhaps school isn't it.

Well, now that I've made my internal debate and external one, I hope someone has a different perspective on these issues, especially the anti-gay t-shirt, because I apparently don't even side with the ACLU on this one.

Always With Style

Soren enjoys playing her computer games. As you can see, she's always sure to be properly dressed up.



What proper lady doesn't need to take her Santa kitten pajamas and purse filled with fake food to the office with her? I'm definitely making sure she's ready for corporate life.